Loving and caring for yourself is not selfish behaviour, it's essential behaviour.  So why do we tend to beat ourselves up with thoughts like:  I'm too fat, too thin, too unattractive, not clever enough, not confident enough, I don't have time for myself,  and so on....  We may also put others first long before we'll do anything for ourselves.  That's unsustainable in the longrun.  Strangely, many healers do this, hence the adage 'healer heal thyself'.   So why do we think & behave like this and what can we do about it?